Blasted Pan
by LoudButStillQuiteDeadly
Summary: So, WHY does Puck hate Peter? This is my version. Btw, I haven't read the seventh book. So if they explained why, don't be all 'NYEHHH! THEY ALREADY WENT OVER THIS! NYEHHHH' Let me have my moment. -sniffs- T for ONE bad word that means a beaver's house.
1. Little Bossy Sabrina

**A/N: Why does Puck hate Peter Pan? Here is an idea of why. By the way, I haven't read the seventh book yet, so if it's truly explained in there, my bad. Don't go all, "BLEHHH! YOU IMBECILE! BLEHHH!" I mean, it's not my fault I don't live where sidewalks are accesible to the library... Take that up with the government, pl0x. XD I know that Puck was banished sort of before Sabrina was born, but for this story, let's go with after. Mmkay? Mmkay.**

Puck was great friends with Veronica Grimm. Actually, he was great friends with every Grimm since Wilhelm. They'd all found something funny, something that managed to be honest, in his gloop grenades and vats of mayonnaise mixed with glue. I suppose, however, that Veronica is the only Grimm besides her children that matters, so far, to this story.

Veronica had one daughter, at that time, that had met Puck before Veronica had been kidnapped. Her name had been Sabrina. She was a little cherub baby. Not yet had her cute little brow been marred by wrinkles. Her blonde hair, almost white, was whispy and fine and curled in tendrils about her light blue eyes. Puck had loved her from the instant, but not in the way that he does today. For God's sake, he was eleven, and she was just a little girl who could just barely stand up! No, Puck loved her in the way a brother loves a baby sister. When Veronica would come visit his statue, without Henry's knowledge, of course, with Daphne not yet brewing in her belly, Puck would take Brina on marvelous flights and play peek-a-boo for hours on end.

Puck had claimed Brina. She was HIS child, she would be HIS legacy, and if anyone dared challenge his big brother claim, he'd teach them something of what they need to know. Brina would be the Trickster Queen- or maybe she'd prefer the Trickster Princess? Whatever. Puck would see to it when it mattered more. For now, her little rugrat ways were enough.

Brina slowly aged, her chubby, stout legs turning into lanky twigs. As she changed, so did Veronica- her belly grew, her face rounded out, and Daphne was on her way. Now Puck could lay claim to TWO new Grimms- oh, this was marvelous. The patron of punks could have two wards instead of one. Veronica watched them from her bench, her baby girl and her little- well, 4,000 year old- boy build a childhood.

Puck enjoyed it very much. Well, he enjoyed it until a certain red-haired, accursed, tight-wearing boy showed up. Actually, he had upgraded to green skinny jeans, a green shirt, a weird emover thing, and lots of peircings. Maybe the reason Pan had irked Puck so much from the beginning was the fact that he hadn't stuck to his word of being a little boy forever.

Sabrina pointed him out first. "Ooh, he's scary, Mommy." She giggled and shoved a dimpled finger in his direction. Pan grinned a studded grin and continued his slow, steady walk to them. Veronica's brows creased. Sabrina crawled on her twiggy legs through the grass and sat at her mother's feet, like a guardian.

"Mew, mew," she said in a high falsetto. "I am a kittykat." She laughed and looked at Puck for approval. Puck sort of laughed nervously to humor her, but he more or less tried to shrink. He'd prefer if Pan didn't see his Brina. Pan would make some stupid story up and tell it to Tink, who would, undoubtedly, tell all the Fairies in Neverland, the gossip she was.

As Pan got closer, Veronica's crease deepened. She scooped Sabrina into her lap, sitting on the park bench, directly across from the statue that was also a gate into the Fairy's world. Sabrina pretended to guard Veronica's belly.

"Grimm. Puck," Pan said Puck's name with disgust. Puck glared at him. Pan ignored it. "And who is this little one?" Pan crouched down before Veronica and Sabrina.

"Why, hello, Peter," Veronica said. She managed to hide what was written on her face from her voice- Leave leave leave leave.... "This is Sabrina."

"What a cutie." He grinned and stuck his hand out for Brina. "Ello there, girl." Sabrina stared at it. It wasn't dirt encrusted. The fingernails were white underneath, not black. They weren't anything like Puck's grubby little feelers. She decided she didn't like it much.

"Hi." She sort of pouted. Traces of her signature scowl were born that day. Puck coughed and lifted Sabrina.

"Got Puck playing Nana, have you?" Pan grinned and stood up. Puck gave a full blown scowl, perhaps where Sabrina learned hers from.

"I'm nobody's Nana," Puck began, about to break into his 'Trickster King' speech.

"Pucky's my friend, and you're mean." Sabrina glared at Pan. "He has wings and fireflies and a flutey thingy! Do YOU?"

"No, girlie, I don't." Pan smirked. "I don't need 'em." He slowly rose off the ground. Little traces of shimmery glitter surrounded him ever so faintly. "She'd make a good Lost Boy, Grimm."

"I'm a GIRL!" Sabrina said indignantly.

Veronica glared at Pan. "I don't think so, Peter." She stood. Her back seemed to creak. She pressed her hand to the small of her back and put a hand under her heavy belly.

"Another one? Perhaps a BOY?" Pan laughed. "Come on, Sabrina. Break from the nursemaid and fly with ME instead." Puck scoffed.

"She's two, ye blasted mosquito. Do everyone a favor and buzz off." Puck put Sabrina down and unfurled his wings. They were two glorious specimens, shimmery pink and blue and green.

"You're not in any position to talk of Mosquitoes, bug boy." Pan glared. He turned his attention to Sabrina. Puck's face glowed with rage. How dare he try to win the heart of his little sister? It wasn't right. "Besides, everyone was two once. I reckon she'll be a looker like her mum someday." He smiled. "Ey, Sabrina. Would you like to meet a good friend of mine? I'm sure you'll love her."

Sabrina tried to answer, but before she could, Pan was motioning for a scantily clad blonde woman to come towards him down the path. She had a frown engraved on her delicate features. She had a little button nose, a tiny mouth, and huge glowing blue eyes that spoke of distrust.

"Grimm, Puck, Grimm's spawn." She nodded in all their directions, but her eyes lingered on Puck. "Long time, no insult." She rolled her eyes and stood with disgraceful posture.

"Excuse me, Missie?" Veronica clenched her fists and lifted them at the wrists, but her arms hung at her sides. "I just dare you to insult my child again. Just do it."

Pan raised his eyebrows. "Catfight. What have you to say, sparrow?" He looked at Sabrina. He seemed to be rather amused.

"I dare you to call me that again. I dare you." She completely raised her chubby little fists that didn't match her rail limbs. Veronica looked down at her little babe. She realized the example she was raising wasn't good at all.

"Pan, Miss Bell, good bye. Stay away from my children." Tink's porcelian features contorted with rage, as they had been for a while. Something odd to anyone but Puck, Pan, and Veronica happened. Tink turned into a two-inch-tall speck with wings that were miniatures of Pucks, which he had, meanwhile, tucked back away into his body. Obsceneties were screamed at Sabrina and her mother, and tink got directly in Sabrina's face. She fluttered down and bit Sabrina. She squealed and batted at Tink. Tink flew off. A good distance away, she turned into her human self, and she stormed off.

"Ah, damn, I've got to go now. Mrs. Grimm. Miss Grimm." Pan smiled charmingly at the two ladies and went after Tink.

"Pucky, what does damn mean?" Sabrina asked casually.

"It's a word that only people like Peter Pan use. Do you want to be Peter Pan one day?" Puck asked earnestly, crouching by the tiny Sabrina. Veronica looked as if she might faint.

Sabrina quickly shook her head.

"Then never, ever use that word. Got it, Missie?" She nodded.

"There's a good girl." He patted her shoulder. "I guess that's enough fun for today, eh, Mrs. Grimm?"

Veronica nodded. "I'll be leaving now. Come along, Sabrina."

Sabrina nodded and wrapped Pucky in a hug. "Bah bah, Pucky!" She giggled and took her mommy's hand. They waved and left. Puck sat down on Veronica's bench.

That blasted Pan, his blasted slave- he'd be a joke in Neverland now. But at least Pan hadn't won his baby sister. No, his baby sister was still his. Good enough, he supposed.


	2. Big Bossy Sabrina

**A/N: Ohhaidere. I didn't plan on this being two-chaptered, but it is, so get over it :) I haven't read book seven yet- I know, shocker- and again, you can take it up with the government if you're so inclined. But because I haven't read book seven, or eight (is there an eighth?) I will force you to imagine that post-book-six and pre-book-seven lasted three years. Mkay? =D enjoy.**

Sabrina, fifteen year old Sabrina, was getting herself done-up for a date.

Now, she knows what you're thinking. 'Sabrina? Dating?' Well, she's thinking it, too. But PUCK asked her. PUCK. So she HAS to go, or she'll be tortured in her sleep. Or shaving-creamed.

She studied herself. No makeup, no makeup, she chanted, though she wanted to put it on so badly... but Puck didn't like makeup, especially on Sabrina, so she just wouldn't put it on, then. She was wearing jeans and a very nice shirt. It was dark, dusty pink and soft and thin and smooth. Okay, so maybe it wasn't VERY nice, but it was better than the ratty t-shirts she always wore day in and day out. On her feet she wore black flats with little bows on them. Puck would make fun of her.

She ran the brush through her thick hair again and again and again, but it only seemed to get frizzier. She wet her hands and patted it, and she achieved a tiny result. She sighed, parted her hair one more time, and threw her hairbrush out of her window so as not to be tempted again.

A twelve-year-old Daphne pranced into Sabrina's room. "Haha, Sabrina, you look like a GIRL." She smiled and fixed Sabrina's bra strap.

"Thanks," Sabrina said with an annoyed smile. She walked past Daphne and down the hallway to the stairs. Granny was in the kitchen, humming and smiling, making something pink, bubbly, and so strongly tasting of rootbeer, Sabrina could smell it.

"There's my girl," Granny smiled. She offered Sabrina a bite of the soup. Sabrina politely declined.

"I don't think so," she smiled. "I don't want to fill up yet."

"Perfectly understandable. I think Puck's waiting at the car." Sabrina looked out the window.

"He is."

"Go get him," Granny said, winking and kissing Sabrina's cheek. "Be home by eight, darling."

"Okay." Sabrina smiled and opened the door with a clattering sound. Puck whirled his head over to her. His gorgeous blonde head.

"Brina! Hi!" he said. "Ready?" His face turned red and he opened the door for her.

"Um, hi. I'm ready." Sabrina got into the car. Since when did Puck hold doors open for people?

Puck flew over the top of the car and got in beside her. The engine roared to life. Puck had to scream to hear himself.

"... BITTY," he said.

"WHAAAAAT?"

"I SAID YOU LOOK PRETTY."

"HUH?"

Puck sighed and shook his head. Sabrina smiled at him and looked out the window, which showed trees flying by, and stared off.

Puck reached for Sabrina's hand, but she moved it to tuck her hair behind her ear, so instead he brushed her lap with his fingers.

"KEEP YOUR HANDS TO YOURSELF," Sabrina said over the engine, slapping his hand away.

"I DIDN'T MEAN TO," Puck called.

Sabrina frowned and continued staring out the window. When Puck arrived at the Blue Moon Diner, Sabrina confronted him.

"What did you say when we first got in the car?"

"Nothing..."

"You said something."

"I didn't!"

Puck went around the car to open the door for her, but she was already out.

"What did you saaaaaay?" she kept pestering.

"I said you looked... like a girl."

"Oh." Sabrina blushed and looked at her toes. "Daphne said so too." She didn't show how much her pride hurt after that.

"You're quite the romantic, Puck," said a deep, smooth bass voice.

"Pan," Puck snarled. He turned around to look at the redheaded teenager dressed like someone from the eighties but with an emover.

"Yes, yes, I'm stuck in Ferryport Landing with you for all eternity. Or until I kill her," he motioned to Sabrina. His eyes roved her body. She sort of hunched herself, uncomfortable.

"Don't lay a hand on her," Puck growled, standing in front of the confused Sabrina.

"I thought Peter Pan was supposed to be a boy forever." She frowned a little.

"Nah. Peter Pan's a man now. And I see you're a young lady." He checked her out... again... "Don't you remember me, Sparrow?" He reached his lean hand out to Sabrina.

She remembered that hand from somewhere. "No. Don't call me that again." She didn't take his hand.

"You didn't much like me then, either," Pan chuckled. "You'll get used to me in time. I'm stuck here forever."

"Who lured you in? Aurora? You aren't that easy to fool, ya know," Puck growled. Sabrina touched his arm.

"Let's go," she said quietly. "We can eat later."

"Oh?" Pan said, pretending to ask a question. "You're eating together? On a date? I thought 'she was two, ye blasted mosquitoe'." He put on a fake voice.

"Weren't you the one checking her out when she was two?" Puck glared. "I think you were."

"You guys knew me when I was two?" Sabrina said, glaring at the both of them.

"You're damn right we did-" Peter began, but Puck advanced him, flute raised.

"Watch your mouth in front of the lady," he snarled.

Sabrina walked closer to Puck and lowered his arm. "We're leaving now, Peter. I hope to see you again." Sabrina was being polite, but inside she was murdering him.

She pushed Puck into the front seat of the car and took off driving to the movies.

"What was that about?" Sabrina asked angrily. "You knew me when I was two? Why didn't you tell me?"

"It never came up," Puck said, avoiding a real answer. "You're a bit young to drive, don't you think?"

"Be quiet," she growled. Puck cowered in his seat. One of his rules to life: don't make women angry while driving. "Now, we're going to see The Proposal, spontaneously make out, and not tell anyone later, and you're going to like it," she growled again.

"Yes, ma'am."

**A/N: Review if you're so inclined to ;)**


	3. Author's Note

**A/N: I don't think you guys can make me add another real chapter :) I really didn't plan on the last one - but it was sort of cute and I don't regret it. So this story is done, complete, fin. Sorry. But if you like my writing, I have an idea: read my other stories. They don't involve Daphne, Sabrina, Granny, Puck, Mr. Canis, or any of our favorite fairy tale characters. So sorry. But I still think they're pretty beastly. There's alot of romance and action and other junk, but my stories aren't as light as the Sisters' Grimm. So if you want to, you can read them. I'll be okay if you don't. Love, Jululu**


	4. Big Bossy Sabrina Part Dos

**A/N: Yet again, I lied. I'm such a liar. I should be punished.**

The movie theater was empty, aside from a few couples sparsley spread around. Sabrina had calmed down by the time they got there; Puck had managed to cure her road rage with a few soothing words and a pat on the back. Sabrina was holding Puck's hand as they climbed to the empty top row.

They sat together in the center, waiting for the previews to finish. They seemed to last forever. Eventually, the lights dimmed, and the movie started. Sabrina sat with her legs pulled under her and her head on Puck's shoulder. Puck's lanky arm was wrapped around her, his cheek on resting on top of her head.

It was miraculous, after years of squabbling, that they managed to be this comfortable with one another. Sabrina couldn't think of anything better than Puck's musky scent, and Puck kept rubbing his hand on top of her long, silky hair. They were hardly paying attention to the movie; in fact, Sabrina's eyes were closed, relishing the peace of the moment.

Puck noticed the three other couples in the room start moving rather interestingly. They were all lip-locked; he picked out their faces as people he knew from school. He wanted to kiss Sabrina, oh-so-badly. What if she didn't want to? What if she merely felt _obligated_ to sit with him, so close and so tender only to make him happy? If he kissed her, and she didn't like it, she'd never look at him the same. Dinner would be so weird, later on, if she didn't like him kissing her. They'd have nothing to talk about- 'So. That kiss.' 'Yeah.' 'It was terrible.' 'It was, wasn't it?' 'Let's never do this again.'

He felt Sabrina stirring underneath him. He lifted his head to free her, and suddenly, her face was inches from his.

"Don't you like me?" she whispered.

"Y... yes..." Puck stammered. He forgot to lower his voice. It was loud, compared to the silence of the other practiced couples deftly making out.

"Then kiss me."

"Oh... Okay." Sabrina was probably the only girl that could turn him as docile as a kitten.

So Puck kissed her. _Oh, God,_ he thought. _My lips are so chapped._

The taste of Sabrina was... purely, entirely sweet. She reminded him of cinammon and smelled of roses, and he loved it so much. He could have kissed her for hours, if someone hadn't sat right next to him.

Puck tore his lips away from Sabrina. "What... the..."

Turning in his seat, to the dismay of Sabrina, he saw the only creature on this planet that would dare interrupt two teenagers in a movie theater.

Pan.

His face was distorted in a hideous smile, pocked with black and silver piercings, and teeth so white they hurt to look at.

"What is your _problem_?" Sabrina hissed over Puck. "Why can't you leave us alone?"

"You're too pretty for that," Pan laughed quietly.

"Listen," Puck growled. "Go away, before someone gets hurt."

"The only one," Pan said, rising, "that would get hurt, is you."

Puck stood up to face him. Sabrina rose as well, shoving Puck aside and getting in Pan's face.

"Go. Away." She pushed him in the chest.

"Got your little girlfriend fighting your battles, eh?" Pan grabbed a stunned Sabrina by the shoulder and pushed her behind him. "Step aside, girly, the men are talking."

Puck curled a fist, drew his arm back, and slammed it, with all his force, onto Pan's right cheek.

In an ideal world, Puck would have been able to hit Pan in the face without hurting his fist. This wasn't the case. Puck didn't practice violence; he practiced trickery. He was much too scrawny to be any good at fighting. As soon as his fist bounced off Pan's face, pain split up his knuckles. He cringed inwardly.

Pan drew his hand up to his cheek. It wasn't very painful; his body was that of a twenty-five year old, versus that of a fifteen year old. He laughed.

"You're going to pay for that." Pan grabbed Puck's shirt collar, held his face close, and ignored his protests punch after punch after punch. The brutality of the blows stunned him to silence.

Sabrina gasped. "Stop it!" she screamed. Sabrina was at Pan's shoulder, trying with all her might to seperate the two. At this point, the entire theater was blatantly staring at the trio. Two or three people stood to see better.

Eventually, Pan stopped punching Puck. As soon as he dropped the shirt collar, Puck stumbled back onto the floor. Sabrina shoved the worn-out Pan away and went to Puck's side.

"Are you okay?" she asked quietly.

Puck was mortified. He was being so pathetically weak. He just let that skinny jean wearing, eyeliner absorbing, black nail polish inhaling jerk beat him out of breath. And Sabrina had witnessed it all. How could she ever like such a crusty-lipped failure?

Shakily, Puck stood. "I'm fine," he said through his fat lip and sore jaw.

Sabrina had stood up and turned around to face Pan. He was still there, looking on with a devilish expression.

"You're pathetic. So absolutely, entirely pathetic. You follow us around like you're some kind of disgusting stalker. You wear women's pants and more makeup than me. Get out of here!" Sabrina screeched. Then, for good measure, she placed a very well-deserved slap on his cheek.

"Oh, you'll come crawling to me, Grimm," Pan snarled. "After this little insect gets tired of you, you'll come to me on your knees!" He stormed out of the theater.

Sabrina wheeled around and hugged Puck with all her strength. "He's such a jerk," she sniffed.

Pack hugged Sabrina back, much more gently. "How do you think I feel?" he muttered.

"We'll tell Mr. Canis. We'll get him to teach him a lesson." Sabrina pulled away from the hug.

"Don't tell him," Puck insisted. "He'd laugh at me. Come on. I'm hungry. Let's go get food." He was eager to change the subject.

"Typical man," Sabrina snorted.

**A/N: Peter Pan is such an aggressive stalker. It's like, gooo awaaaay, haha. This was pretty short, but a review made me want to write it. I'm not sure if I should upgrade the rating or not... Meh. Whatever. If there's an eleven year old that doesn't know what 'making out' or 'fist fights' are, my hope is restored in the universe. It's actually so much worse than the last two chapters. I haven't written in forever, and this is sort of a writer's block baby. This story is probably actually really done now, haha. Unless I get more suggestions about what I should write about next. (:**


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